You're You

Cleaning kennels

Before you judge me...
Or anyone like me...
Please... live at least one day in my shoes.

Please...

Clean the number of kennels I've got.
Care for the number of dogs that I've saved.
Apologize to those broken-hearted dogs in your care... for things you didn't do...

Answer one of the calls that I get.
Check one of my emails.
Read the hateful comments I see... about me... from the ignorant people... who have never been "me" ... but assume they know more about "being me" ... than I do.

Feel the despair I feel... when I'm forced to say "No."
Feel the anxiety I feel... when I'm forced to say "Yes."
Feel the hopelessness I feel... when I'm forced to say: "I have nothing left to give."

And then... if you're me...
When you have nothing left to give...
Give more.

Give up yourself.
Give up your life.
Give up everything in your world... for others.

And when you struggle... beg for the help you need.
Hope that it will arrive...
Know... that it probably won't...

Hope that you're wrong.
Pray that you're wrong.
Know... that you're probably right.

Because...in truth... you're all you've got.
You're all they've got.
No one else... signed up to be you.

Only you did.
You're you.
Be proud... of you.

If someone hates you...
For being you...
So what???

The haters...
Are hateful.
They have nothing better to do.

Because they aren't you.

Dear Haters...
Get. A. Life.

No matter what you do... others will judge you.
Others will criticize you.
Others will hate you.



Walking the Lucky Dogs

Simply because... you're good at being you.


In their attempts to find your faults... they simply highlight their own.
They only wish they could do... what you do.
And yet... they'll never be you.

Only you can do that.
YOU manage to change the world... every single day.
And it kills them.

Because...
You're...
You...

While they suck at being them...
Do. What. You. Do.
Be. You.

That's all you gotta do.

CLICK TO DONATE TO LUCKY DOG RESCUE!

Always Be Kind

You just never know when something you say, write, or do ... could manage to reach someone when they need it most.

You just never know...

Sometimes, that someone may come right out and tell you how you've impacted their life.
Other times, they may say little --or nothing-- about it...

Regardless, the result is always the same:
You did good.

While it's never about the need for their acknowledgement or appreciation (at least, it shouldn't be)... many times, you may do something truly impactful... without even realizing that you've made any difference at all.

Maybe you did something for someone, simply because it was the right thing to do, and then you went about your day.

Or you said something to someone, because they needed to hear it, and then you carried on with your life.

Or maybe you wrote something for others, just because you cared, and then you went right back to work.

All the while... you have no idea... that you've just changed a life...

Often, your own actions will seem trivial, meaningless, and insignificant to you. You may assume the following: 
Other people make a difference.
Other people change the world.
Surely, I'm not one of them.

But in your mind, you know that you're a good person.
And obviously, you try to do good things.
So eventually... you're going to reach someone.

But even when you do...
If you're like me...
You probably won't realize that what you did even mattered.
You probably weren't even expecting it to.
You probably did it anyway, just because it felt like the right thing to do.

So then, after the fact... when someone comes to you and says: "Thank you for what you did. I really needed this today."
You're honestly pretty shocked.

When they say: "You reached me when I needed someone the most."
You're actually pretty dumbfounded.

And when you hear: "This is how you've changed my life..."
You're absolutely speechless.

While those words will mean the world to you --and undoubtedly change your life, too...
in that moment, you'll totally be thinking: Wait... I did that?!

You were simply trying to do the right thing.
You never expected to make that kind of difference.
And yet... you absolutely did.

To you... it may have been nothing.
To that someone... it may have been everything.

Here's the deal:
Even if we don't know it...
Even if we don't believe it...
Even if we don't use it...
We each hold the power to change something...

Sure... I'll be the first to admit my own self-doubt... especially when it comes to the idea of impacting others. I rarely think I'm capable. I'm usually just speaking, writing, or acting from my heart... with little-to-no expectation.

That's especially true when it comes to my blog... or as I lovingly call it: my dinky, ole blog. 
I write posts... and for whatever reason-- people read them.

When I write, I'm just hoping that maybe my words will bring comfort to someone. Or maybe I'll change their way of thinking. Or my greatest hope... maybe they'll feel inspired in some way.

Do I expect these things to happen? Definitely not.
Do I expect anyone to read it? I certainly don't.
But I write anyway... because there's always a chance that something good could come out of it.
And for me, that's enough.

Yet... most of the time, I doubt myself, especially when it comes to my writing.
Even though I've written from my heart.
Even though my words are true.
Even though I believe in my message.
I still think to myself: Wow. I suck.

Regardless, I write anyway.
Why does it matter?
Well... every single time... it just so happens... someone, somewhere needed to hear those words that day:

"Dear Ashley- Sometimes in life, someone reaches you, at the exact moment you needed them. Today, I experienced that moment. You were that someone for me. Thank you, Ashley. You changed my life today."

Reading messages like those, I'm always shocked, speechless, and amazed. But mostly, I'm touched.
So touched.
So moved.
So thankful... for the person who took the time to thank me... for something I never expected a "thank you" for doing...
For something I never even thought I could do.

It's an incredible feeling... to reach someone when they need to be reached. There's nothing like it.
In truth, we should all try our best to make a difference for others, every chance we get.
After all... that's why we're here.  

And honestly...
If I can make a difference... then you can make a difference.

It's not about my writing.
It's not about my blog.
It's not about me.

It's not about giving myself credit for doing something "amazing" ... 
Because what I do with this blog... isn't amazing at all.
I write posts from my heart, because I care. Then, I share them. That's it.

But here's why that matters:
I could easily allow my own doubts, my own criticism, and my own fears to stop me from ever writing anything in the first place.
Yet... I write anyway.
And so... I'm able to make a difference... simply because I tried.

Each and every person holds that same power... to change something, for someone, somewhere.
A smile can change something.
A hug can change something.
A kind word can change something.
YOU can change something.

We're surrounded by a world of people (and animals) who feel alone, broken, and hopeless.
You'll pass them each and every day.
You'll rarely know their struggles.
They'll rarely ask for help.

And yet... they need you.

A simple, random act of kindness on your behalf... could be all they need... to feel okay again.
YOU could give them hope--today, right now, this second.
All you have to do... is try.

Above all else, always be kind.

You just never know when you'll say, write, or do something... that will change a life forever. 
If you feel it in your heart, say it.
If it lives inside your soul, write it.
If someone needs your help, do it.

An opportunity is always waiting for you...
Someone is always wishing for you...
A lost soul is always hoping for you...

Maybe you'll make a difference...
Maybe you won't...
Try anyway.

CLICK TO DONATE TO LUCKY DOG RESCUE!

Life is Art

Art takes many forms: drawing, writing, singing, dancing, acting...
Art is creation.

Creators make the world more interesting with their crafts...

Artists make the world more beautiful with their work.
Writers make the world more bearable with their words.

Musicians give us a tune, and painters lend us a muse.
Designers send us ideas, and chefs help us with food.

Actors urge us to feel.
Comedians prompt us to laugh.
Singers inspire us to sing.
Dancers remind us to dance.

Art is creation.
Art is... life.

Life is a canvas. A slate. A stage.
It's a song. A dance. An open page.

Life is... art.
You... are the artist.

Life is... a story.
You... are the author.

Your life is the story of who you are. It's the novel of what you are. It's the tale of why you are here.

It's the story of... you. A story that's yet to be fully-told... because it's yet to be fully-written...

You are writing your story... right now.

As with any tale, each life has a beginning... and an end. But unlike most stories, the way your life began, and the way it ends, are nearly irrelevant to the plot.

One day... however long ago... you were born. It doesn't matter where or when it happened. You're here.

And some day... however long from now... you'll die. It doesn't matter how or why you do. You're gone.

All that matters... the only thing that matters... is how you lived.

In other words... how you choose to decorate the canvas of your life... how you choose to fill the pages of your story...

The good news? The way you choose to live this life... well... that's just about the only thing you can control. You can't change the circumstances of your birth. You can't change the inevitability of your death...

But how you live... that's all you, buddy.

The experiences after your arrival... the events before your departure... those are the things that matter --the only things that matter.
The "in-between" ... is life.

Life is a canvas. 
A massive canvas, a forgiving canvas, a distinctly-unique canvas.

Yet, it is not a blank canvas. Where you came from. What you came from. Who you came from. Each of these things tossed some paint onto the canvas of your life.

Even still... none of these things... defines your creation.
You do.

Maybe you aren't big on "the arts." Maybe you aren't that "creative." Maybe you suck at drawing, and poetry, and crafts. And maybe you don't give a crap about any of that.

Regardless... in your own life, you are the artist. You are the author. You are the creator.

You are... you. No one else can be that.
Your life is... yours. No one else can live that.

You are the only you who will ever live. Your story is the only story of you that will ever be told.

The artwork of your life can be everything you want it to be: Mediocre or impressive. Boring or impactful. Fleeting... or everlasting.

Your time here can mean something. Your story can change something. Your life can matter.

It's all possible... because you hold the brush, the pen, and the paper. You are the creator of your own destiny... your own legacy.

No matter what your "artistic abilities" may be... you are an artist. Even if you can't paint, you're a painter. Even if you can't sculpt, you're a sculptor. Even if you can't write, you're a writer. Even if you can't act, you're an actor.

Your life is a stage. Act.

*Act today by donating to Lucky Dog Rescue. Giving to others is one of the most beautiful ways to make your life count. 

CLICK TO DONATE TO LUCKY DOG RESCUE!

Is It Worth It?

This is a follow-up to my previous post.Click below to read: Why Dogs?: http://luckydogrescueblog.blogspot.com/2012/02/why-dogs.html

I received a lot of amazing feedback regarding my recent post: Why Dogs? One of those responses was a simple text message from a friend... one that really got me thinking.
The text read:

At one time, everyone knew what their life purpose was meant to be... but we were taught to forget it, in the name of money and security. You held onto yours. Great post.

Those words reminded me of something I wrote and shared on my blog last year:

"When you're a kid, anything is possible. You think big, you dream bigger, and you know--without a doubt-- that you can do anything. Over time, the world beats us down. The big thoughts are exchanged for conformity. The bigger dreams are traded for stability. The 'can-dos' are replaced with 'can't-dos.' We call that 'growing up.' But really... we didn't grow up at all. We gave up." ~ me

That text message, coupled with my own words, really made me think about the importance of dreams and purpose... and why so many people let go of these things. I couldn't help but question the lessons we're taught... about wealth, security, and success...and the lives we go on to lead as a result.

Mostly, I thought about the regrets, felt by so many, because of those teachings. And I just kept asking: Why??? 

Why the hell do we allow this to happen??
Why does our society value money and status over dreams and purpose?
And why do we continue to defend this behavior... and re-teach these lessons... when they lead to so much regret for so many people?

I've always been a pretty big fan of the word: "Why?" But when it comes to questions like these... I'm rarely satisfied with the responses I receive.

Here are some examples:
"Because that's what you're supposed to do..."
"Because that's how it has to be..."
"Because that's how we've always done it..."
"Because they said I should..."
"Because that's how life works..."

Wait... that's why?? 

Maybe it's the complete lack of logic in these responses, or the total non-explanation of those answers, or the seeming complacency with it all. Maybe that's what bothers me so much...

Maybe it's the surrender-without-a-fight mentality... the it-is-what-it-is indifference... or the because-I-said-so attitude.

Maybe it's the lack of conviction... the absence of vision... or the denial of alternatives.

Or maybe it's the tiny whisper of defeat I often hear, behind the voice that provides those answers. A subtle mix of anger and sadness that says: "I don't know why I gave up... but I did it anyway..."

It's heartbreaking to see so many people going through life with such deep regrets about their decisions to give-up on their dreams... often feeling as if they missed their entire reason for being here. Especially because... it just doesn't have to be that way.

Now... before I go on, let me say this: I have a pretty firm grasp on reality. I'm absolutely aware of just how difficult life can be. I also realize that "growing up" is an obvious, unavoidable part of life, which places many constraints on our childhood views and aspirations. I'd never deny that we're each faced with a ridiculous number of responsibilities to uphold, bills to be paid, and struggles to overcome. I get it... and I'm not neglecting any of that.

Therefore, this post isn't my crazy attempt to paint a ridiculously-skewed, ass-backwards, rainbow-skittles-backdrop, behind the otherwise-grim actuality of our lives. I'm not trying to invent some kind of bippity-boppity, humpty-dumpty, whistle-while-you-work, fake-ass-fairy-tale-of-a-world... in which we can all survive on simple wishes and gumdrops.

Instead, I'm simply sharing my view of an issue that impacts each of us in some way... affecting our lives, our dreams, and ultimately, our purpose for existence.

However, in doing so, I'm NOT advising anyone to suddenly abandon all responsibility and rationale. I'm not encouraging random, reckless decisions to quit your job, sell your house, or become a wandering gypsy. Okay, moving along...

Here's the deal: I receive a ton of amazing messages and letters from all of you (In fact, I receive so many, that I'm waaay behind on getting back to everyone. But I promise I'm working on it. Okay, back to the purpose of this whole thing...).

In many of those messages, I read words like these:
"I just wish I could do what you're doing..."
"I just wish I'd started at your age..."
"If only I'd followed my heart like you did..."
"If only I could go back and change it..."

These messages are extremely touching --and beyond heartbreaking-- all at once. I'm always affected by the deep emotions within those words: desire, hope, and passion... mixed with sadness, regret, and despair.

As I read those messages, I can't help but think: It just doesn't have to be this way. It shouldn't be this way.

In truth, the very things that these people so desperately wish to do or change... can absolutely be done or changed... but they just don't realize it yet. Or maybe, they just haven't tried.

Instead... at this point in their lives, they almost feel trapped by their existence... burdened by responsibility and circumstance... stuck, anchored, and paralyzed by their own decisions. 

I think we've all felt that way at one time or another. We're human... and being human kinda sucks-ass sometimes. But, really, that whole "being-a-person" thing is actually our greatest strength. It means that we hold the power. That means YOU hold the power.

If you aren't happy with some aspect of your life, I'd just like to encourage you to change that. Especially if the unhappiness stems from feelings of an unfulfilled purpose... which can lead to some of the biggest regrets ever felt in this lifetime.

Of course... we've all heard the phrase: "If you don't like something, just change it." But obviously, this push-for-action is much easier said than done... and seems slightly-mission-impossible. So, I'm certainly not saying, "Just change it. Fast. And now."

In reality, it's just not that easy. Attempting to redirect your life is no kindergarten-cake-walk. But... it can be done. It is possible. Maybe it can't happen today, or tomorrow, or even this year. And maybe it even seems silly to you, at this point in your life, to start changing a bunch of crap... just to follow some distant dream or passion.

My life ain't always pretty

But here's my opinion: if it matters to you, then it matters. And if it matters enough... then it's worth it.

If it seems silly, or pointless, or impossible to you, then just consider the author of this blog post (That would be me). I'm only able to write these words with such conviction, because I've lived it.

If you think that I was simply handed some kind of enchanted existence, full of fairies and pixie dust... well, you're dead wrong. I've never even met a fairy in real life, and trust me-- pixies are stingy as hell with that damn dust.

Instead, my purpose became my path, because I had a well-defined dream, I believed in that dream, and I busted my ass to make it come true. Was it easy? Hell no. Was it worth it? F*** yes.

I worked at jobs that I hated... just to save the money I needed... to do what I love. It wasn't an easy, fun, or fast process. But it certainly wasn't impossible.

Today, I'm able to make a difference with my life, doing what I love. That being said... I'm very honest about my reality...  about the struggles I've faced --and continue to face-- as a result of that decision.

My particular dream didn't lead me to a life of endless stability, security, or ease. In fact, I actually gave all of that up... to follow my dream... to fulfill my purpose.

Sure... it sounds a little crazy... since that's pretty much the complete-and-total opposite of what most people do... or are told to do. Obviously, it's a much more popular choice to simply discard dreams for security, right? 

That works for some people, and there's nothing wrong with it. But, if you're like me... you need both. You've got to make a living... just like every other person... but you refuse to deny who you are in the process.

Call me crazy... but I truly believe that every person who needs both... can have both. More than that, you deserve to have both. You're worth it.

However, it's far from easy. It requires a ton of hard work, determination, and desire. You have to want it. You have to believe that it's possible... and worth it. And, at some point, you have to go for it. 

It's a journey... a process that's every bit as unique as you are. I can't tell you what will work for you. I can't advise you on how to start. I can only speak from my experience, and share what worked for me...

First, I had to reconsider what it means to "make a living." That is... what it means to me. And for me, how I made that living mattered more than how much I made.

Next, I had to reevaluate everything else.  I had to accept the things I couldn't change, and focus on what I could. I had to honor my responsibilities, while reaching for the possibilities. I had to listen to the concerns in my mind... without ignoring the dreams in my heart.

I had to redefine what it means to be wealthy, successful, and stable. I had to rearrange my priorities, to reflect those new definitions. I had to separate "needs" from "wants" ... and sacrifice "wants" for "needs." I had to adjust my perception of those sacrifices ... to view them as contributions.

Then, I had to develop a plan-of-action. In doing so, I had to balance optimism, pessimism, and realism. I had to recognize the difference between the three. I had to acknowledge the risk of failure... while preparing for success.

Most of all, I had to believe... in a way that made me seem bat-shit crazy to everyone around me. I had to believe in my dreams. I had to believe in my purpose. I had to believe in myself.

The hardest part? At some point, I actually had to do it. I had to take that leap of faith. I had to go for it. I had to try.

I won't lie to you... when I finally jumped, it was scary as hell. I didn't know the outcome. I questioned myself often. I wondered if I'd even make it.

Back then, I lived on pure faith. Even today, that's often how I survive. Is it easy? Hell no. Is it worth it? F*** yes.

At this point, maybe I don't know everything, but here's what I do know: I grew up, but I never gave up. I stayed true to myself. I believed in my purpose. I held onto my dreams. And, in turn, I became what I was always meant to be.

Actually, for me... nothing has ever been more worth it. 

At the end of my life... when I look back on my time here... I'll be able to smile and say:
I lived, and it mattered.

What could possibly be more worth it than that?

CLICK TO DONATE TO LUCKY DOG RESCUE!

Why Dogs?

Why dogs?

If I had a dollar for every time someone's asked me: "Hey Ash... why dogs? Why did you decide to rescue dogs?" ... well... I'd be rich as hell.

Actually, no... I take that back. I'd still be broke, because I'd just spend all those extra dollars to rescue that many more dogs.

Regardless, it's a good question. A valid question. A question worth answering. Why dogs?

The answer to that question seems so obvious to me. It's pretty simple... but also complex. Basically-- I'm trying to answer the question: "Why are you... you?" 

Why dogs?

For me, it all started sometime around... well... birth. All my life, I've had this insane love for animals... especially dogs. But more than that... for as long as I can remember, I've been absolutely fascinated by them.

This fascination runs much deeper than a simple: "Aww, look at the doggy!" I'm drawn to dogs... and dogs to me... in this weird, almost magnetic-type way. In a way that sparked my curiousity as a child... that grabbed my attention, and my heart... and never let go. 

That fascination has undoubtedly shaped much of the person I've become...& much of my life. Because... even as a child, I knew that I'd been given a very specific purpose in life. From my very first encounter with the creature we know as "dog," I just knew.

How did I know? Well, it's hard to explain in words, but here's my best attempt:
As a kid, I was able to connect with dogs in this unexplainable way... to understand them, to comfort them, to feel their pain. It's not that I felt sorry for them... I actually felt their pain... with this insane level of emotion and empathy that --quite honestly-- should've been totally foreign to a super-happy, extremely-outgoing, very-social child like me.

Even still, I felt it... and I couldn't turn away from it, nor did I want to. Instead, I became driven by this intense, unwavering desire to heal their pain... no matter how much pain I felt as a result.

As a little girl, I realized that saving them... somehow saved me too. Each time I helped one... each time I saved one... I could feel these words so strongly in my heart: This is why I'm here.

Looking back on my life, I've sometimes wondered if my willingness to take-on the pain of others, beginning at such a young age, may have changed me --damaged me-- in some way. Maybe so... but really, those "changes" were always meant to happen for me. It all goes back to purpose, and I truly believe that every person on this Earth has a purpose. This one's mine.

Okay... so maybe this sounds a little silly to you: "Oh really? Your purpose is dogs??" And maybe you're still asking the question... Why dogs?

I guess now would be a good time to get a little more specific about this whole "dog purpose" of mine. Sure, I love all dogs, and of course, I feel connected to each and every one of them. However, my deepest connection... is with a very specific group of canines. I call them... the forgotten dogs.

My Rudy

These are the dogs who have suffered through each and every day of their existence. The dogs who only know fear, neglect, and torment... pain, heartbreak, and despair. The dogs who spend years crying out for help... with no response. The dogs who wait, every minute of their lives... for the love that never arrives... the relief that never shows... the hope that never comes.

The dogs who would live and die... without any purpose at all... if no one ever made it their purpose to save them.

And that's why I'm here.

It's my belief that every single person on this Earth has a distinct, unique, and significant purpose in this life. Otherwise, why are you here? Some people are here to save people... and others --like me-- are here for the animals. Which is good... because we all have needs, and we all need help. People have needs. Dogs do too. 

Quick note: many "non-animal" people feel very offended when someone compares dogs to humans. However, I'm actually not trying to compare the 2 at all. Obviously, dogs are not people. Dogs are dogs. They are amazing, unique, companion creatures, with extraordinary capacities for love, compassion, loyalty, and forgiveness. These traits are inherently canine... and cannot be fully grasped --or replicated-- by humans. The beauty of a dog... is that they are a dog. We humans could only wish to compare to that. 

Rudy & I

Further, unlike humans, dogs don't have the ability to meet their own needs. They have no thumbs, no cash, and no voice. Therefore, a dog's existence is entirely-dependent upon our willingness to meet those needs for them. Their health, their happiness, and their futures hinge upon the hope that someone, somewhere will help them. Maybe someone will care enough to do something. But even if you don't care... guess what? They still love you anyway. That's some powerful stuff right there. That's the kind of love... that deserves saving.

So... your question is: Why dogs?

In short, here's my answer: Why not dogs?

PLEASE CLICK TO DONATE TO LUCKY DOG RESCUE!

"When you ask me why I care so much, I wonder why you do not. When you ask me how I do so much, I wonder how you do not. When you ask me what I'm trying to prove, I wonder what you are not. You ask because you wonder. I wonder because you ask." ~me

*Thinking about my Rudy today. This one's for you, buddy.

CLICK THE LINK BELOW TO READ MY FOLLOW-UP TO THIS POST: Is It Worth It?http://luckydogrescueblog.blogspot.com/2012/03/is-it-worth-it.html

Guilt

Guilt.

To be such a small word... it holds so much meaning.

At some point in each of our lives, we've all experienced guilt, in one form or another.

Sometimes... we feel guilty, because we've done something wrong. Maybe we hurt someone, or failed someone, or lost someone.

At those times, we should feel guilty, because we made choices that compromised our integrity... and we hurt others in the process.

It's important for us to acknowledge, accept, and process those feelings of guilt, because that's what makes us human-- humans who actually give a crap. But also, that guilt can be leveraged for good. It can push us forward... challenging us to right the wrongs, and become better people. 

In those cases, guilt provides us with an honest opportunity to apologize, make amends, grow, and heal. Obviously, these are good things.

However... far too often... we feel guilty for things that we shouldn't feel guilty about. And I'm calling myself out on this one... big time.

I'm guilty of... excessive guilt.
Chances are... you are too.

What do I mean?

Well... I feel guilty when I work too much. I feel guilty when I work too little. I feel guilty when I ask for help. I feel guilty when I don't even ask.

I feel guilty when I say, "Yes." I feel guilty when I say, "No." I feel guilty when I take chances. I feel guilty when I avoid risks.

I feel guilty because I did too little. I feel guilty because I did too much. I feel guilty when I put myself first. I feel guilty when I put myself last.

I feel guilty for about 37 million other reasons too, but I think you catch my drift...

Sooo... at this point, you're probably thinking 1 of 2 things: 
1- "OMG! Me too!!!"
-or-
2- "This chick is sooo lame..."

To those of you in that second group... you're absolutely right. I'm way lame.

But to the first group... that "me-too-crew", I feel your pain. Trust me... I do. I'm always worried that I've let someone down, even when I haven't. I'm always feeling like I haven't done enough, even when I have. And I always seem to apologize for things... that need no apology.

With that last line about apologies, I can guarantee you that every person who knows me personally... just laughed and thought, "She sooo does that."

Here's a classic example:
My friend, Kirk, is also my most dedicated volunteer. Every single weekend, he comes out to help walk my dogs. While he's here, he smiles, he works his ass off, and he never complains. Oh, and he brings breakfast. Yep.... he's awesomeeeeee.

So, a couple of weekends ago, Kirk headed out the door to walk a dog. About 10 minutes later, it started pouring down rain. I immediately thought, "Mother-son-of-a-french! I just sent Kirk out in this shizz!"

A few minutes later, Kirk walked back, smiling and laughing-- completely freaking drenched. And I said, "Oh my gosh, Kirk! I'm soooo sorry about the rain!!!"

He looked at me, laughed, and said, "Ash... did you seriously just apologize for the rain?? I mean... I knew you had a lot of power and all... but I really doubt that you're actually to blame for this..."

I laughed and said, "Well played, sir. Apology retracted."

So, what's up with the guilt complex? Well, for people like us, it actually stems from compassion. We feel guilty... even when we shouldn't... because we care. In general terms, that's a very good thing...

But what I've realized is this: It's okay --even honorable-- to put others first. Just don't always put yourself last. That's the quickest way to lose your power in this world. That's the quickest way... to stop being... you.

Don't trade your power for guilt. Trade guilt... for your power.
[Note.To.Self.]

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The Best Year of My Life

One year ago today, on January 12, 2011, I published my first blog post: My Story. That day, Lucky Dog Rescue Blog was born.

When I wrote that first post last year, I honestly didn't know if anyone would read it. As I poured my heart into every word, I wondered if anyone would care. And when I clicked "Publish" for that very first time, I thought to myself: "Good luck changing the world with this crap. Never gonna happen."

Well... today, I'm here to say... I was wrong. Because, in my own small way, I did change the world with this blog. And it all started... one year ago today...

It's funny... because I almost didn't start this blog to begin with. Sure, I've always been a writer, and I've always been a rescuer. And over the years, a lot of people have asked me to start a blog. But honestly, I always thought, "Hmm... not so much."

So... I never did.

Then, last December, a friend strongly encouraged me to do it, and she offered to build it for me. I distinctly remember saying, "I really appreciate it... but... well... it's just... I'm not a 'blogger.'"

It's not like I thought a "blogger" was a bad thing; that certainly wasn't the case. I guess I just figured I wasn't one of them.

Sure... the word-itself kinda freaked me out a little bit: blogger. It sounded a little weird, or silly, or ridiculous: blogger. I think it reminded me of the word: booger... and that's just not really something I wanna be associated with.

But my friend insisted that I at least give it a try, and honestly... I didn't have much to lose. If no one reads it, oh well. And if even one person does... maybe it will inspire them in some way. Maybe.

So... I said: "Okay. I'll do it."

In coming up with a name for my blog, the choice was pretty obvious: Lucky Dog Rescue Blog. Then, I sat down to write my first post.

I asked myself: "Who am I? And --more importantly-- why am I that person?" The answers to those questions would soon become my very first blog post: My Story.

Before it was even published, I nearly deleted the whole thing. But instead, I asked a friend to read it first.

This particular friend is not a "rescue friend." She's just a normal-person, non-animal-freak, friend of mine. So, I was a little worried that she wouldn't relate to it... or maybe... she just flat-out wouldn't like it. But I knew she'd be honest with me, so that's why I asked her to read it.

Then, she called me in tears, and said, "Ash, it's perfect."
I asked, "Are you sure? I just don't think anyone will want to read this thing."

She said, "Just wait... your life is about to change."

I remember laughing, and saying: "Yeah right. No one is going to read this crap, and my life will be exactly the same one year from today... as it is right now..."

Famous last words, right?

When I look back on the last year of my life, I'm truly blown-away. Has this blog changed my life? Damn right it has. Has this blog changed a lot of people's lives? Amazingly... it really freaking has.

As I've said many times, I honestly didn't think that anyone at all would read this thing. And even today, as tens of thousands of readers visit my blog each month, I'm still shocked that anyone at all even comes here. 

But... in just one year... more than 350,000 people have visited my dinky-ole blog, with well-over 550,000 page views. It's completely freaking unbelievable.

Even still, I guess I didn't realize the impact of my blog... until people started to contact me. And not just any people... important people. Magazine people. Website people. Pet company people. People who love my work, love my writing, and for some crazy reason, love... me. And insanely enough, they wanted use their work... to feature my work.
Do what now???

In just one year, Lucky Dog Rescue Blog has been featured in 5 national magazines: American Dog, Bella Dog, Life+Dog, Dog Fancy, and Cesar's Way (Cesar Millan, The Dog Whisperer). I've also been contacted by major websites, pet companies, and big-time news stations about my work. By documentary producers, respected animal activists, and some pretty big-name peeps.

All of those people... are pretty-freaking-important people... who shouldn't even know who-the-hell I am. And yet... they are contacting me??

Blog reader, who is now my dear friend

But more than any of that... it's the connection I've made with each of you that means the most to me. I've received thousands upon thousands of amazing emails, messages, and letters from all of you... with words that have moved me to tears. Words that have healed my heart. Words that have changed my life.

Thousands of words... like these:
"I just wanted you to know how much you've inspired me..."
"I just wanted you to know how much you've encouraged me..."
"I just wanted you to know how you've changed my life..."

"I followed my dreams, because of you..."
"I don't feel alone, because of you..."
"I saved a life, because of you..."
"I adopted, because of you..."
"I volunteer/foster/transport/donate, because of you..."
"I started a rescue... because of you..."

"You told me it was possible, and I believed you..."
"You told me I could do it, and so, I did..."
"You told me not to quit, so I didn't..."

"I thought it couldn't change, but then, you changed it..."
"It seemed like it was hopeless, but you gave hope..."
"I swore it was impossible, you made it possible..."

"I've never had a hero... but now I do. And I wanted you to know: my hero is you."

Wow. Just... wow.

When I started this blog one year ago, my greatest hope was that I'd inspire at least one person to get involved. Just one person. But I never could've imagined... that my words would inspire thousands. Hundreds of thousands.

It's just more than I ever dreamed possible. Much more.

If you don't believe that anything is possible, just look at me. If you don't believe that one person can make a difference, here's your proof. I'm your proof that anything is possible. I'm your proof that one person can do it. I'm your proof that the world can change.

And for me... here's why that matters: Because, in proving that to you... I was able to prove it... to me.

Honestly, it changed my life.

My name is Ashley. I'm just a girl... in Mississippi... with a dream of changing the world. 
And look at what I did... in just one year.


*From the bottom of my heart, thank you for making my dreams come true.

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Grow Up?

Yep. I'm just a big, dorky kid

When I started this blog nearly one year ago, I knew that I'd be putting myself out there.

With every post I've written since, I'm always aware that I'll be subjecting myself to unnecessary criticism, judgment, and hatred. Sadly, it comes with the territory.

But luckily, that negativity only represents a very small, insignificant portion of the response.

The vast majority of the feedback... is amazing. I'm beyond touched by the incredible amount of love, encouragement, and support I've received from all of you. And I'm truly inspired by the stories you've each shared with me... regarding the impact of my words on your lives. It's just more than I ever dreamed possible...

As I've said many times... I'm still shocked that anyone at all is reading this thing. So... each time I receive any feedback whatsoever --positive, negative, or indifferent-- I'm reminded that someone, somewhere is reading what I write. That's pretty darn crazy. 

Grow up? Me??

In simple terms, I write a blog about animal rescue. But much of the time... I write about life. And over the months, I've shared many of my personal life experiences with all of you.

By doing so, many people feel like they know me, even though we've never met. I think that's awesome... and really freaking cool. 

But of course, there are those always-present critics, who not only feel like they know me, but also feel like they have the right to judge and disrespect me, even though we've never met. 

As with anything in life, there's such a stark contrast between the opinions of the supporters and those of the haters. And while the critics' opinions don't really make a crap to me, I'd still like to use their words --along with the comments of some supporters--  to provide a little more insight into why I am the way that I am...

"She should really grow up..."

In some of those rude, negative comments and messages, I've been told to "Grow up." While I find that pretty darn cute, I have to be honest: I'm kinda hoping that I never really "grow up."

Because... at the core of me, there's a little girl with a dream. And my dream has only come true... because that little girl never "grew up."

She never gave up.

Yet... I also think many people forget that I'm only 27 years old. Just a few short months ago, I was 26. I guess that's how this whole "aging" thing works. Who knew?

The 20's represent a critical time for each of us... to learn, to grow, and to evolve as individuals. This is the decade of our lives where we begin to figure out who we are, what we need, and who & what we love.

"She's really immature"

My 20's are just as important to me... as your 20's are (or were) to your own journey. I learn something new each and every day... and each experience allows me to further become the person I'm meant to be.

However... on the other side of that "grow up" coin... many have often said: "Ashley, you're so wise beyond your years."

While that's a huge compliment to me, it's important to note that any "insight" or "wisdom" I may have... didn't happen by accident.

I was forced to "grow up" long before I ever became an "adult." I've been through a lot in my short life... I've fought battles that most people never have to face... at ages that no one should ever have to face them. That'll make you "grow up" in an instant ... whether you're ready or not.

"She laughs too much."

My parents have watched their daughter go through things that no parent should ever have to witness. My friends and family have seen me through it all... acting as supporters, therapists, and cheerleaders... despite their feelings of helplessness and sadness for me... as I went through things they'd never experienced in their own lives.

Of course, I've never written about many of those experiences... and maybe I never will...

But the point is... I was forced to "grow up" a long time ago. Today, if I really wanted to, I could give a million excuses for being too broken and wounded to go on... and everyone in my life would understand.

But I don't make excuses, and I don't accept pity. I live my life; I follow my heart; I do what I love... each and every day.

I feel so fortunate that I experienced the hardships I had, at the times that I did. Those things helped shape the person I am today. I'm a good person. I do my best. I have no regrets.

"She gets on my nerves."

At the same time... I'm still a 27 year old girl, just trying to make it in this world. I'm a grown up... who's not a grown up. In my opinion, that's the best kind.

Many of my biggest critics... are more than twice my age. I could be their daughter, or granddaughter. So, surely... they're more "grown up" than me, right? Or at least, they should be?

Honestly, at 27 years old, I'm as "grown up" as I need to be. In many ways, I'm too grown up. But I'm still a big kid at heart... and I'll never grow out of that. It makes me... me.

My life hasn't been easy... and I'm thankful for that. My world hasn't been perfect... and neither am I. But as far as I'm concerned, I'm proud of the life I lead... and who I am.

And honestly, that's all that matters.

"Above all else, be proud of who you are." ~Tom Owen, Dad
"There's no Mom on Earth... who's more proud than me." ~Debbie Owen, Mom

"When you're a kid, anything is possible. You think big, you dream bigger, and you know --without a doubt-- that you can do anything. Over time, the world beats us down. The big thoughts are exchanged for conformity. The bigger dreams are traded for stability. The 'can-dos' are replaced with 'can't-dos.' We call that 'growing up.' But really... we didn't grow up at all. We gave up." ~Me, Daughter, Person, Rescuer

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